March 20, 2012

How To Be A Safe Ostrich

By Paul Bieber

It’s so easy. You don’t need gloves, glasses, hardhats, safety vests or, anything. You dig a hole, stick you head in, and you are safe. For the ostrich it works 100% of the time. You see, if they survive the attack by the predator, they are safe. If the predator sees their feathered back-end up in the air and pounces, the ostrich is instantly killed and doesn’t comprehend he is about to become dinner. From the ostrich’s point of view, life just doesn’t get better.

So, that is the end of this blog.

But wait, what if the title would become, “How To Be A Safe Glass Worker”. Can you stick your head in the cut-off rack, ignore all the safety hazards and still be 100% safe? Sure you can. Of course you can. I think you can. I hope you can.

Well, here’s my offer. If you don’t insist all of your employees wear all of their safety gear, all the time, I’ve got a deal for you. Please drop me a note with your business address. I have a plan to open up a competing glass shop across the street from every glass company in America where the workers don’t wear their safety gear. I know they won’t survive in the business world. And, then I will own the only glass shop around.

The safest business is, when all things are equal, the most profitable. I can quote you all sorts of case histories about this…trust me, it is true. OK, study the history of Alcoa Aluminum, where in the last thirty years, they have been among the safest companies in the world, and directly because of that, one of the more profitable.. You’ll see. A safe business manager, foreman or supervisor knows everything in his/her responsibility and that means less waste, clutter and chances for injury. When processes are smooth and accident-free, they are more efficient. That means less cost, happier workers and more profit.

Work safe, prevent injuries, reduce their impact by wearing the proper protective equipment and your company will be better off.

And to think, you thought this article was about a big bird. What, you want more about ostriches? OK:

  • It’s brain is smaller than it eyes, which are the size of billiard balls.
  • An ostriches intestines are 46 feet long.
  • Ostriches can run up to 40 mph.
  • There are over 2,000,000 world wide. They are not endangered.
  • Ostriches are so powerful that a single kick at a predator, such as a lion, could be fatal.
  • Ostriches don’t really bury their head in sand. They just lie with their head and neck on the ground, giving the appearance of being in a hole.

And with that last fact, you see that my initial premise is slightly off-base, but it sounded so much better, I just left it in.