March 1, 2016

A Simple Guide To Losing Customers and Friends In The Glass Industry Or How To Gain Them.

By Paul Bieber

Section I
Yes, indeed. It is so simple. Just follow Paul’s rules and you can easily lose your customers. It only takes a minute or two. And in the same two minutes, you can also gain a good contract.
Paul’s rules to lose a customer at a job conference with three companies getting the bid information:
• Interrupt your competitor at every chance you can.
• Call your competitor an idiot in front of your customer.
• Tell your customer that you don’t know anything about the upcoming job, but that you will get it done by hiring experts.
• Never smile at your customer. In fact, frowning and scowling has proven to be better in almost every case.
Paul’s rules to lose a customer at a private job conference:
• Tell your customer that five years ago one of your current competitors filed for bankruptcy.
• Stress that you hire Americans, unlike your competitors.
• Prove to your customer that your competitor isn’t smart enough to get out of the rain. Show him that picture you took at a job site where their men actually worked during a rain shower.
Paul’s rules to lose a customer when you are at a job conference with the job 75 per cent done and there are problems.
• Never, ever admit that you were wrong. Ever.
• Blame the steel workers because the building is out of square.
• Blame the fabricator of the glass for the units that broke during installation. They must have weakened the glass.
• Explain to your customer that it is better to have scavengers pick up your wooden crates than to have your men break them down for the dumpster. You don’t want your men to get splinters!
Paul’s rules to lose a customer when the job is done and you are asking for your final payment:
• Of course the job is finished. You know it takes a long time to the breakage replacements for the fabricator.
• Tell him that one of your men got a hernia on this job and unless you pay now, you’ll tell your worker to sue them.
• Scream at the customer. Do it again. And again.
• Tell your customer that you are a big man in the industry and no one holds money back from you. I’m sure your customer will believe you.
Section II
Pauls’ Rules To Get and Maintain Clients
• Read this blog. Twice.
• Put a copy on your company bulletin board.
• Have an all company meeting explaining that you are customer driven, always.
• Tell your employees that Paul is usually a hot-air gasbag, but this time he got it right. Do the exact opposite of the rules in section I.